I’ve landed homeless again.
Having taken Jo to the post office to try and sort out paying for her passport it turns out that she’d not bothered to sort out her parents details. So.. she’s applying for a legal document pertaining to identify her as her… and she doesn’t bother to get her parents information??? The guy in the post office could barely believe what he was seeing. We left and I asked her quite how she thought that was going to be ok. Cue lots of screaming… culminating in her telling me to pack my bags.
Marvellous. I try and open the world up for her and … that’s what I get.
It’s not new. She’s screamed at me many times in the few weeks I’d been there. While packing… more screaming. Apparently I still love Deb? hahaha The woman who 13 years ago murdered our unborn child. Apparently Shannon (just a lass from the pub) will put me up. I also of course still love Michelle (who I’ve seen probably 4 times in 16 years). It’s entertaining to note that in 9 years with Esther I think we argued to the point of raised voices once… maybe twice. And I was actually IN a relationship with her.
This is the same woman who upon my arrival attempted to emotionally blackmail me into staying by registering me as her partner and thus having all her benefits stopped.
I made a choice when I chose to leave Heidi’s. It was for her good (Heidi’s) and was supposed to be for mine too. Hell was I wrong! Of course… Jo is now a stone or two lighter, no longer needs her crutches, no longer needs the injections she was having (I think it was 6 a day for her diabetes), has travelled .. and was about to have the gateway to the world handed to her on a plate.
The plan was, to stay there, recoup the money I’d used to lend to Heidi to pay her rent (which she’s kept!!) while she kept hospitalising herself, and then get my own place. Amazon came up trumps but, I simply couldn’t work there while being under Jo’s roof. The arguments and shouting, the bizarre behaviour. The stress of being in the hovel that is Amazon and then coming “home” to that, was killing me. Literally. I’ve been ill more times in 2 months than I have in 10 years!! And so… I quit Amazon, seeing a roof over my head as being the priority. Also, the belief that, removing that stress could make living at Jo’s more tolerable. But the issue wasn’t with me. It’s with her. An insane paranoia about how “She’s not stupid” and everything is centred around people not wanting her. It’s underlined by how her son treats her. My refusal to enter into a relationship with her, even though I was basically completely trapped there just wasn’t something she could handle. Passive aggressive turned into simply outright aggressive… until this.
And so… i find myself homeless.
I suspect this might be my last entry here. My money runs out in a few days. Whither then.. I cannot say.