So, this is it. It’s a year today since I flew “home”. That’s all of my one year anniversaries done. Divorce, Wedding Anniversary where I’m no longer actually married, birthdays, the works. It’s a year since I spoke with Esther verbally A year since I’ve heard her voice.
I hate what this blog has become. It needs to change. For a year and a few weeks it’s been orientated around the anger and desolation which have engulfed me since I finally said “genoeg” (Enough!). Even now, there is so much vitriol waiting to erupt in the wake of the events a couple of days ago where, in yet another example of selfish mufkut-ery the entity calling itself van Sluijs decided to completely erase our old relationship on Facebook, thus meaning that over 100 pictures vanished, all tagged check-ins are gone, anything she shared on my wall is gone and anything I shared on hers meets the same fate. 8 and a half years of memories, wiped away. I, of course, have left all my albums open so that she can view and swipe any pictures that she wants because, while I would happily rejoice at hearing she’d been mown down by a bus .. I’m actually a decent person who thinks about other’s needs. The idea of erasing memories like that is just far too callous for me to even contemplate. But then that’s Esther. Not a single thought for me.
I can’t be bothered to write more. The anger is filling me with stress. I had chronic chest pains for the first time since I came back to the UK all night when I saw what she’d done. Time for some music instead.