A Death in the Family.

Mother died, Jan 22nd from what is now confirmed as a brain aneurysm. From what I gather, she felt nothing, and knew nothing about it. 

Heidi-Rose had the unfortunate experience of finding her, in the hallway at Cornwall Grove. Arriving for a visit, she could see her gran laid out on the floor. I feel for her. No one should have to find someone like that. Since then, it has been protocol and family stuff to deal with, of which neither are doubtless anything which H needed to start the year with. After her last year you would assume the poor lass was expecting things could only get better. 

So, i suppose, technically I am an orphan! I’d like to say I feel something, but I don’t really think that would be accurate. I think Es was in shock, having been presented the duty to tell me as even up until now, a few days later, none of the family besides H has had enough about them to actually physically speak to me. Not that it matters now, it is however indicative of the wonderful workings of the Wiseman’s. Es received a mail from Susan telling her “frantic call from H…. Mum’s died, can you tell Al”, which, rather than digest, she just read aloud, blurted out, and so that’s how I found out. All day from then on she was, what I hope is, not herself, so much so that at the end of the day I could quite happily have packed my stuff and left, never to be seen again. Really not the best day to test my mental strength and stubbornness. Having spent 12 hours telling her I was ok, and not being listened to, I’d had enough. Esther having never met the woman, I think, was simply not computing how I was able to deal with it, and cracked herself. I truly believe if someone had rung up, that reaction wouldn’t have happened. It was irresponsible to mail anyone. The family all have access to my number, I should have been told in person. As it was, I ended up having to call Heidi-Rose to confirm.

I have to point out that, I cannot fault H in how she is dealing with this. The woman is strong, and I for one, am impressed. 

So now what? As yet I have no funeral date. Esther is granted time off, so that’s good. I could do the whole thing on my own as I did with Dad’s funeral, but I suppose it may be healthier to have Esther there. That’s assuming she holds up better than she did on Sunday. without an actual date nothing can be executed here in the way of flights etc. There will invariably be bitching and moaning about things going on within the family. Ruminations abound as per normal. I have had a dialogue with Hamish, which suggests to me he is better than he was when it was Dad’s turn to bugger off from this mortal coil. That is a good thing. Other than that, communication lines have been devoid of activity.

There is much I could say, much I doubtless will say, but for now, purely from respect for Heidi-Rose, I shall keep my own council regarding my mother. She was many things to various people. To Heidi-Rose she was simply Gran. And for that, I am sorry for her loss.  

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