fun filled Wiseman wonders

Ah, it’s a saga my family. Poor Esther. What have I introduced her to? "What now? ", I hear you cry. Hamish this time! *chuckles* He truly does have issues. I happened upon an article a couple of days ago about Co Proximal, which is a pain killer, or rather, was! It has been taken from the Uk market and subsequently the amount of suicides in the Uk has dropped drastically. I linked to the article from my facebook account with the header "Co Proximal… Hmmm.. I think Dad used that and Tagamet when he tried to top himself. Certainly both him and mum used this regularly." (Here is the article for those interested)  hmm Apparently this is THAT offensive that Hamish has to delete me, and then as explanation, in a mail to my wife, states "My children had to read that post about their late grandad. It’s now
the second offensive post about my father and anyone who cares to
publicly scoff, deride, or flippantly speak of him in a way which I
find offensive shall have their scrawl removed from my reading.

Now, Hamish’s children are all adults, mid to late 20s and are friends with me on Fb. None of them have said they are upset/offended… because.. umm… it’s not offensive possibly! Him deleting me, has absolutely no effect on as to if they read my posts or not. To use that as an excuse is silly, bordering on the imbecilic. To claim the article, or my linking to it is offensive, is frankly stupid! In actual fact, what this article does is, offer an explanation as to why Dad attempted to do what he did, approximately 24 years ago. It suggests that it wasn’t the divorce and issues with the family exploding that caused him to do this, (something which Hamish claims Andrew, himself and Su and Iain agree I  was the cause of, something which Su and Iain have both denied.). How is that offensive? I remember finding the guy unconscious on the floor after it happened. Now i at least have a credible explanation  as to why this happened. I recall at the time, that my parents had supposedly split "because of the children", but I was the only "children" at home then, and it’s not really the greatest experience in a 12/13 year old’s life to find his Dad unconscious, and then hear this is being attributed to an overdose which is of a direct consequence of you! Kiddy logic can be cruel when you’re searching for a reason/something to blame, because the first person you you! Fortunately I was not drawn into that downhill spiral. 

However… what this demonstrates nicely to Esther is a predisposition within the family, to instantly associate "Alistair say’s" with "oh he’s being nasty", and then forward that to other people, when the actuality/reality is completely different. However, because this sort of thing has gone on for years, rather than anyone asking me about stuff, they just swallow it. I am reminded of Mother telling people that I’d been round there threatening her, and she called the police. As it happened I was in the company of a policeman at that time in not just a different town, but a different COUNTY when it supposedly happened. Subsequently, said policeman contacted Crewe police to offer himself as a witness, only to find that the whole thing was made up, Mother had made no complaint, obviously I hadn’t been there, but then, when I confronted the people who had been passing this story around about me because mother had told them this… not one of them had the balls to A: Apologise to me for believing it, and B: collar mother and call her out on her lying, because, rather than come to the realisation that this is what my family are capable of, they would rather choose to think bad of me, and if I were to believe Hamish’s assertion then, I guess this stems from the parents break up and it being my fault. What is great about this is… Esther (should i mention the Masters degree in Psychology again) … can see this happening. Finally someone else can call this out and say.. "Hang on… that’s actually not true/right". Peoples issues with me from the family, are not based on who I am, but some bizzare creation given out by people like mother, because lets face it, in the last ten years, I’ve probably spent under a weeks worth of hours in total with with Hamish, and none with Iain, or Anne, or Andrew, or any of my nephews. There has only been Su who’s spent any time with me, and that, curiously enough, only started after Dad eventually died, something which none of my blood relatives found it within themselves to tell me about incidentally. 

So, I sit here, and shake my head! Not because I’ll miss contact with my brother, hell, even via facebook our communication seemed to boil down to me correcting him on a couple of things, and pointing out he was forwarding fake applications carrying viruses, but it’s the principle behind it, and the fact that he has the audacity to attempt to claim to my wife that i was being "offensive". Sorry matey, but my wife kinda umm.. knows me. The only explanation I can come up with, as well as the preprogrammed "Oh it’s Ali therefore it must be bad", is that, this issue interferes with the way Hamish wants to remember events, and therefore casts doubts upon his whole way that he dealt with our parents split. Well… in that case. Unlucky. It’s about time he woke up from his delusions and realised the truth. They split cos Dad was mentally ill, and if you call mothers obsession with the church and her having been an adulteress for having married an already married man a mental illness (which i do, especially as I lived through it with her), then she was too!  

Still, I pointed out on Facebook that I bet no-one contacts Hamish and calls him on this as being out of order, and at least Su, not wanting contact with Hamish for obvious reasons, commented that there was nothing remotely offensive about the post. Hamish of course cannot see this, having blocked me, lmfao but it’s the thought that counts. She has her own issues at the mo from what I can gather, as I’m reading Niki is coming over to stay with Heidi-Rose, which might not be a bad thing all ways round, although i can’t help but think H will have her hands full there, Still, I’ve been the sibling coming to live with the older sister before a few times, and it can be fun til you fall out. Anyway, I was saying, the opportunity was there for Iain, Denise, Lois, Andrew (if he ever accepts my friend, Richard, Chris, etc, any Wiseman, to comment and say "Yup, i agree, it’s just a factual intro to a piece that actually might have bearing upon that situation, all those years ago. No one did. and the reason… ? Well, I draw the same conclusions, it’s easier to continue to think bad about someone (me) you don’t really communicate with, than to call out someone you actually have a relationship with and tell them they’ve wronged me, because that might jeopardise  your relationship with them…. and perish the thought that you might do that just for your principals! lol

Anyway… lol… moving on. We had a great 2nd year anniversary. A decent meal, a couple of beers afterwards, and a good chat. Doesn’t seem 2 years ago that we were drinking Newcastle Brown on Trader Vic’s in Las Vegas, in 85f temps. Time flies. Speaking of time.. the wii is binging at me so it’s time to leave this be for a while… and take out my frustrations on Table Tennis, which of course I am magnificent at! lol 


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