Was reading a stupid questionaire thing on someones bulletin, and the question popped up.. "What would you do if you found out your best friend was Gay?".
Your probably thinking… yeah, so what. Anyone knowing me knows im open minded about stuff like that.. so come on Ali.. what the hells the point?
Well.. it stuck me. I no longer have a best friend. I have no-one who i could just bell of an evening n say, Im bored, need a beer, you coming out? Certainly not in the local area. In Crewe there was Mike, n Danny, Stu n Steve, Jock etc. Even in Wolves i had blokey mates who i knew would be about for a beer if i was out n about. But here… theres no-one.
Dont get me wrong, it’s not that i go out n stuff anyway, and i am without doubt the kinda guy who is awkward when making mates cos i get so bored with tedium, but its just wierd that if i want to do anything.. i’ve a choice of calling a lass, or doing it alone. And male convos are generally a bit different to bloke on lasses.
I think i need some R n R. Just a few days where i dont have to worry about the fact that my position pretty much everywhere is tenuous at best. Either that, or i need another job mighty quick.
Was asked how my love life was by a mate. I chuckled. Seems everyone here (Telf) is so haunted by their past that the future aint even a consideration, and they’ve forgotten the the present is called that.. The Present.. because its a gift. Im not usually single for long, infact march to august may well be a personal best for a long time. But then, i guess im not exactly a viable proposition at the mo, n besides, when everyones so busy looking backwards they cant see whats in front.
Wasnt that long ago someone thought the same about me. An ex was supposedly blighting my chance of happiness. I didnt see it that way. See, ghosts are without substance, so why would i let something without substance cause me grief. Was an example of the different way which people view things. I look at the world through logicAli eyes. Sometimes that makes me cold and clinicAli (alledgedly), but usually it makes me sensible enough to be able to get rid of the emotional crap which hampers judgement. Also it usually makes people second guessing why i am like i am wrong, but hey, it doesnt stop em!
Ok.. Scrubs on ABC1.. Su’s house.. real Tv! Scrubs… n now House, the 2 things i make time for to watch!